傍晚到街上走走，半路遇見家姐，不知應否叫她，因為她沒有預期看到我，突然出現，怕把她嚇著。猶豫之際，她好像看到我了，便上前叫她，她一臉茫然地答應著。回到家裏，她說在街上認不出我，只覺得我很面熟。看她臉色，好像很介懷自己認不出細妹，可能她「以為」自己正在康復吧。
回到房間開著電視，剛巧播映《有你終生美麗》，在John Nash決定對抗心病之前，那時常發呆，抱著大哭的兒子仍然發呆的樣子，和她一模一樣。每天，不是睡覺便是看電視，沒有任何人物事可以提起她的興趣。然而眼望著電視，卻總沒焦點，她仍然沉溺過去。
對於我，John Nash所以是天才，不在他的學術成就，而是他克服逆境的能力。你不一定克服得到，但至少會「盡」力去做。甚麼叫聰明？她時常自詡聰明，揶揄、嫌棄男友愚蠢，卻不懂逃離過去，不讓生活好過一點，那算甚麼聰明？我覺得，她是沒有機會康復的了，不只因她不能放低過去，更因她根本沒打算放低過去。既然只想緬懷過去，連兩個女的起居生活有沒有飯吃都懶得再理，還介意甚麼認不認得出我？
我時常想，人活著只有一個總目的，就是「快樂」。我是常人，我的快樂就是一般的快樂；孫中山昂山素姬甘地教宗是偉人，他們為別人謀幸福，甘於承受痛苦，從而尋找更高層次的快樂。她，是奇人奇技顯神通，是另一個人的附庸，只要和他一起，無論如何受虐也覺快樂。離開，才是真正的痛苦。所以，她崩潰了。所以，還是別打擾她發呆，因為她根本在重溫美夢，追尋她自己的快樂……
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2 comments:
Spare a minute contemplating the Chinese title: 有你終生美麗
Dismissed as translation disasters, local titles often pale alongside their original, except this one which I think should earn some merits for adding that extra dimension to the film--it was also the story of Nash's wife, the 'You' who travels the same rocky path with her husband and never once abadnons him.
Jennifer Connelly's role won her an Oscar as Best Supporting Actress, though why not in a leading role few could offer an explanation. Perhaps the Academy dismissed her just like we viewers did when most, if not all, attribute the glorious fruit that Nash earns to his courageous fight against the illness and undying spirit.
The first time I saw the film, there was an overwhelming sense of confusion--both on the screen and off it. Without reading a single review, I was caught off guard baffling if John Nash was schizophrenic or were those prosecutions real, and or was I identifying with his sufferings in my own real life. No, towards the end of the film, it became obvious that it was the former. Imagine myself sitting among the prestigious Nobel crowd, I gave my biggest applause to Nash's wife whose husband was awarded the Nobel prize that evening.
What I am really saying is, people who need help are precisely those who don't even know how to ask for help. And it takes extraordinary gift, persistence and patience, and above all Love to be that special person. I think for once in our life, we can be that special person for somebody.
穎:
我想我對她們那種狠, 是真的狠!
有時不要想得我太好, 對於我所不喜歡的, 如果是家人, 會更氣忿, 發作起來是冷漠得嚇人的!
我不想自己這樣, 但真的很憎人自私, 而她的自私單害了自己還不算, 更害了其他人, 這是我最看不過眼的。
哈, 又想黎火添!
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